Fatherless

You’re my father my all
And you hear when I call
But I’m not perfect
Cos I’m still learnin I’m still learnin
I’m still learnin I’m still learnin
But I know you’re watchin over me
I was 5 when my father left
Askin mum why am I fatherless
And gettin high just to calm the stress
Even some nights now I cry cos I can’t forget
But I got the mind of an architect
Tryna rebuild my life from the darkest depths
But I can’t do it
And I realise I need time to restart this mess
Puttin words to my pain as I start to sketch
Hearts are wrecked
And scars are left
And hatin my dad seems to charm my flesh
But I’m forgiven much
And I ain’t wanna harbor debts
Nah and that’s the hardest test
Makin sure my old life is regarded dead
But to live is Christ and to die is gain
And I knew that before the ink on my arm
Was set
You’re my father my all
And you hear when I call
But I’m not perfect
Cos I’m still learnin I’m still learnin
I’m still learnin I’m still learnin
But I know you’re watchin over me
Blood stains mark the carpet
Domestics were a normal part of life
Hearin mum scream through the walls
Were some darker nights
Bein 12 you kinda feel powerless to intervene
Past 3 years have been the same
Now it’s killin me I hated school
Every chance I got I’d be getting wasted
Hated seein kids bein happy
Whys it never changing
Why has Craig got a mum and dad
Stayed together
Why is my dad remarried
Someone else moved abroad to live
And have another kid
And why can’t mum stop cryin every night
Tell me why I can’t make it better
I was never raised on no estate
But the pain that I faced on the daily
Was breakin me down
To the place where I couldn’t take life no more
And death seemed a way for escapin
This was the mindset I kept
But I didn’t change when I did
I knew that I’d be dead
You’re my father my all
And you hear when I call
But I’m not perfect
Cos I’m still learnin I’m still learnin
I’m still learnin I’m still learnin
But I know you’re watchin over me
If everything goes wrong
I’m fallin into your arms
I know you hold me
I know you won’t leave (2X)
You’re my father my all
And you hear when I call
But I’m not perfect
Cos I’m still learnin I’m still learnin
I’m still learnin I’m still learnin
But I know you’re watchin over me